How much are you worth?????

I turned 28 yesterday! I am officially an old maid. WoooHoooo!!!! Instead of putting old ladies on those cards they are going to plaster my face on them instead, coming to a store near you :~) You would think that that would make me sad especially since I cried last year on my birthday but interestingly enough I didn’t cry I had a great day, even though I had to go to the doctor. You may ask why? Don’t worry I did too but I have been thinking, I know scary. I have thought about a persons worth. I have been worried about the fact that I am not married, I have no kids but I always had work to show my worth or I thought that was how you determined how valuable you were to society. Well I no longer have a job so worth has been a hard concept to swallow. I thought I am going to be 28 and not married, no kids, no job, and now due to recent events no car. Where is my worth? I didn’t know for awhile and I have been stuck in a rut trying to pull myself out and yesterday it hit me. Life is not about whether you have a job, how much money you have, or if your married and have kids. Don’t get me wrong I would like to find me a handsome husband and I definitely want kids but I am not worthless because I don’t have those things. That is what the world wants to tell me. I am still a person with thoughts, feelings, emotions, and I still have something to offer. I don’t need to have a label to be someone and I don’t need anyone to tell me what my worth is, I determine that… not you!!!!!

I’ve realized my friends and family do not judge my worth based on those things. They love me for me. My family is amazing. And we may be loud and obnoxious, talk over each other, we may fight or should I say we do fight, we certainly yell, and there is always plenty of rough housing but we love each other. I couldn’t tell you anyone I would rather spend time with than my family. They drive me absolutely crazy but life is never boring. We like to hang out with each other and I see most of them more than once a week. Except Davin and Jordy there like the phantoms you never know when they are going to show up. Kind of wish they would show up more.

I have the best parents in the world. They would do anything for anyone. They would go without so you could have what you needed. I know that if I ever need anything my dad would be there even if it was one in the morning and he had to drive an hour to help you and an hour back just to make sure your okay. I can talk to him about anything and know he will always try to help me with whatever. He lets me make my mistakes and helps me learn from them. My mom is the funniest woman on the face of the planet and even though she lives in an entirely different world she tries to understand yours and help you muddle through and find your way. If you have an ailment she is your woman. I can always call her and know she will have advice or at least a listening ear. My parents have taught me to love everyone and be myself.

Life is about the moments and the people you share them with. It’s what you make it. It’s that simple. It’s playing games until your mom wins, its playing name that tune on long car rides, it’s laughing uncontrollably because someone said something completely wrong, its sitting around a bon fire making s’mores and telling stories, its my niece telling me she loves me randomly and that I make the best eggs in the world, its my nephew calling me car (cuz he can’t say my name yet) and saying happy to me all day because its my birthday, its their little giggles, its watching Jane Austin movies with Crys, discussing paranormal with Josh, its talking to Randy and going to his Sunday dinners, its Jordy calling me just to talk, its Davin calling me to tell me that he is letting me borrow his gun and telling me its not cuz he loves me or nuthin’ its cuz he doesn’t want me murdered because then he would have to hurt someone, its Cade calling me just to talk and then he just sits on the phone and his little laugh.

I guess what I’m trying to say is I have people in my life who love me for me and I may not have a job, money, car, a husband, or children but that is not who I am. Those things don’t define me, I do. I don’t need the world telling me who I am and who I am not. You define who you are. Quite letting others make those decisions because there is too much at stake. Live your life and don’t miss out on the little things because when your standing before God on judgment day, you wont have any of those things all you will have is your heart and your memories. Make sure you have good memories and stitches in your heart to show you lived. From now on I will live from moment to moment, good or bad because those are the things that make up who we are. Are you using your time wisely?